“’Eyyyyyy! Wazzup, everybody?!”
The familiar intro music & animation faded, making way for everyone’s favorite dragon rat, Lulu Ratatoskr. With a following eclipsing 200 million subscribers, she was one of the most well-known internet personalities to ever exist. Even she’s not quite sure how it happened, much less in just a little over a year, but somehow, she & the rest of her vtuber pals over at Ensign took the world by storm, pioneering a unique spin on the gaming video medium that a majority of people apparently resonated with. It was definitely a lot for her to take in just how insanely popular she was at first, but over time, she’d grown used to it…Mostly…
“How we all doin’ today?! Y’all ready to get started?!” She grinned, ready to get the day’s stream started & finally try that new game that just dropped last week. Sadly, real life & other projects had kept her too busy to hop into it until now, but now that she was free, she was locked & loaded. Chat seemed pretty hyped, too…maybe…It was always hard to read at the start of a stream due to the sheer amount of messages. Strangely, though, she couldn’t pick out any of the usual greetings or excited remarks that she normally got around this time, nor did the chat seem to be slowing down at all.
“Whoa, whoa, alright, guys. I get we’re all excited, but let’s maybe calm down a bit, ‘kay?” They did not, in fact, calm down. Words just kept flying by her eyes in a big, blurry mess. After focusing really hard, she managed to register a few of them.
‘Wtf’
‘Impossible’
‘Congrats’
‘News’
“…News? What news?” Having basically just woken up, Lulu hadn’t really done anything yet besides eat breakfast & get her stream set up. To be fair, though, she wasn’t exactly the type of person to keep up with current happenings anyway, but still. Somewhat dreading what she was about to learn, she grabbed her phone & made to look it up.
Knock Knock Knock
“…What the?” She wasn’t expecting visitors today, much less at this time. “…I’m gonna…be right back.” With that, she muted her mic, switched the stream to her intermission overlay, & headed for the door.
What awaited her on the other side was something she never would’ve expected.
“You’ve muted your stream, correct?” Standing outside her apartment was an unfamiliar woman, tall, short hair, a black dress suit adorning her entire body, complete with gloves & a pair of dark shades that masked her eyes.
“…..Umm……….What stream?” Part of being a vtuber meant keeping her real identity a secret wherever possible. Granted, it was more of a recommendation & common courtesy than anything, but regardless, she liked to think she’d done a good job at it thus far & wasn’t about to let it slip now…though it wasn’t until after the words left her mouth that she realized how stupid & unconvincing she sounded…
“Look, we know who you are, Lulu. Now answer the question please.”
“……….I…..don’t know what you’re talking about?” Again, totally unconvincing. Her chest tightened as the woman groaned & pulled out her own phone, pocketing it after quickly checking something.
“Now then, Amanda Brinks. My name is Agent Jones, head of national security as well as the president’s primary bodyguard.” Amanda felt like her brain crashed as she struggled to think of what to say.
“…So…You’re with the government?” Jones nodded. “Which is how you knew about…” She trailed off as she pointed behind her towards her streaming room. Seemingly understanding her, Jones nodded again. “…..So, umm……….What do you want, exactly?”
“You mean you don’t know?”
“……….No?.....Wait…” Having slipped her mind until now, she suddenly remembered what she was doing before this unexpected visitor showed up. Fearing she’d somehow done something incredibly wrong, she whipped her phone back out & scanned the relevant news. It instantly became apparent what was going on as headline after headline popped up, each one saying roughly the same thing.
‘Lulu Ratatoskr Wins Election’
‘Random Anime Girl Steals Presidency!’
‘Biggest Upset in US History as Famed Internet Personality Takes the Win’
“……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….WHAT?!?!!?!?!?!?” If her brain had broke before, now it felt like someone had taken an iron pipe & smashed it into a billion pieces.
“Great to see you all caught up. Now then, we have a lot to prepare for, so let’s-“
“W-W-Wait, hold on now.” Pulling her brain back together with duct tape, she forced herself to speak. “This doesn’t even make any sense! I mean, I didn’t even run! How the heck did I win?!”
“Well, you know how ballots have that write-in option? Seems like a majority of voters chose that & wrote in your name.”
“B-But why me specifically?!”
“Heck if I know.”
“W-Well, what about the other candidates?!”
“Your votes topped them all. As for why, it’s…probably not my place to comment on the matter.”
“…Well…” While she had no strong political opinions of her own, the general vibe Amanda got from being terminally online was that none of the primary candidates were particularly…well-liked…so maybe that part wasn’t that nonsensical…sort of… “…Regardless, what makes people think I’m qualified for this?!”
“Well, to put it bluntly, you aren’t. Then again, this entire situation is rather unprecedented to begin with, & if we don’t give the people what they asked for, I fear for what might happen.”
“So you’re really gonna force me to do this job that I didn’t sign up for & really don’t wanna do then, huh? Can’t I just concede or something?”
“If you want to put it that way, then sure. & technically, I suppose so, but again, I would suggest going along with it for the time being. Give the people what they want, & if after a time you feel like you’re no longer up for the task, then we can consider bringing in a replacement.”
“……….W-Well…..O-Okay then…I-I guess…” Truth be told, she was about as far away from okay as humanly possible, but it wasn’t like she had a choice in the matter.
“Great. Now then, I’ll get a schedule emailed to you by tomorrow of things you’ll need to do to get ready for Inauguration Day. Take the time until then to mentally prepare yourself.” Now in full-on work mode, Jones hastily strode out the door. “I look forward to working with you, Miss President.”
“……….’Kay…..Bye, then…..” Still trying to process what just happened, she closed the door & returned to her stream. Rather than start it back up, though, she just sat there, contemplating if she even wanted to continue it at this time. After a few minutes, she made her decision as she donned her headset once more & turned off the intermission.
“……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….……….AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUHHHHGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
To say the next two months were a complete slog was an understatement. Most of the streams/projects Amanda had planned had to be postponed or outright cancelled in favor of mind-numbing inauguration prep work. Seriously, it was a miracle she’d gotten through it with her sanity intact. Now, for better or for worse, the big day was finally here.
“& just to be clear, you’re absolutely, positively, 100% sure you want me over literally anyone else on the entire planet?” She’d posed that question to Agent Jones every single time she’d seen her, hoping that someday, she’d miraculously change her mind.
“Even if I wasn’t, you’ve already come all this way. No sense getting cold feet now.”
“I guess…..b-but still! What the heck am I supposed to do?!”
“Like we discussed, go out there when you’re called & deliver your speech.” She gestured towards the door leading out into the main area of the Capitol building.
“Y-Yeah, you’ve said as much, but I can’t go out there looking like this!”
“Why not? You’re the one who picked out that suit.” True, she was, & she had to admit it actually suited her pretty well. That was beside the point, however.
“Yeah, but I didn’t think it was for this! They’re expecting to see Lulu, right? I’m not her without my equipment at home, & I’d rather die than have to reveal I’m her!”
“I see…I keep forgetting how unique this situation is…Anyway, we figured you might say that & thus had this prepared for you.” From out of her briefcase she pulled…a headband with cat ears.
“……….Thanks?” Amanda hesitantly took them, a look that screamed ‘what the heck am I supposed to do with these?’ adorning her face as she did.
“Just put them on & press the button behind the left ear.”
“…Well, okay then…” Still unsure, she did as she was told. Upon doing so, she heard a quiet zap & felt a light shock pulse through her body, but other than that, nothing had happened. Looking to Jones for advice, she realized the agent was holding out a hand mirror.
“……….Wh-What the-” The face that stared back at her wasn’t her own. It was Lulu’s. & it wasn’t just her face. Every single inch of her had miraculously transformed into her other persona. Even her rat ears, her tiny dragon wings, & her thin, scaly rat tail were all there. Like, physically there, physically movable, as if they were actually a part of her body. “…I-I don’t…H-How…Wh-What…”
“State-of-the-art experimental hologram tech. We’re the government, ma’am. Don’t act so surprised.”
“Sure, easy for you to say. You’re not the one using it” Lulu mumbled under her breath. “…A-Anyway, as crazy as this is, I can’t actually go out there like this, can I? I mean, Lulu’s a virtual character. Wouldn’t it be weird if she just was suddenly real?”
“Yeah. What do you think all that’s for?” Jones pointed to the opposite corner of the room where a video camera & broadcasting equipment was set up.
“…..Starting to think I need to start paying more attention to my surroundings…” Granted, she was unbelievably nervous & didn’t really take a good look around the place as a result. Heck, she still was. “……….You…really think I can do this?”
“Aww, c’mon. You’re really gonna chicken out now?”
“…..Huh?” A voice she never expected to hear suddenly pierced her ears. She swiftly spun around, only to find…
“…..Guys?!?!” Standing by the door, in the flesh, was the other members of her vtuber group. She’d only ever seen them in person a handful of times before, most notably during their one-year celebration, but she could never forget those bright, shining faces. Despite not knowing any of each others’ actual names & having first met as part of this job, the five of them quickly became the best of friends, an unstoppable motley crew of weirdos conquering the sea of stardom together.
Celine Saber, the saber-tooth wolf & the group’s resident gremlin. Easily excitable & a bundle of positivity, Lulu couldn’t even remember a time where she was sad or upset, which was kind of surprising given her penchant for shooters. Then again, she is quite the expert, & even in the rare case where she does lose, she just laughs it off. It always felt weird seeing her in person without her model’s huge saber teeth, though.
Tiara Triandra, aka Ti-Ti, the canary fairy (heh heh) & self-proclaimed queen of all. Donning her four bird wings like a robe & her antennae like a crown, a lot of her mannerisms involved inflating her own ego. That being said, she never downplayed anyone else in the process & was always there to lift people up when they were down. In spite of how she came across, she was actually quite smart as well, being a master of puzzle games & an avid visual novel lover & even starting up her own book club.
Orla Arachne, the…enigma. Rather aloof & slow-witted, this whale spider has always gone at her own pace, valuing fun over work wherever possible. She also highly values sleep…which tends to be why she’s consistently late to her streams. Heck, she’s even falling asleep a few times during them, though that could also partially be because she tends to stick to cozy games like simulators. What’s truly wild about her, though, is the fact that her model’s height &…asset size…aren’t nearly as exaggerated as one might think. Just…don’t be a bully or do anything that’d make her upset…That’s when the spider arms come out…..
Elise Bogmire, the final member of the group &, for all intents & purposes, the team mom. Despite her rather tomboyish nature, she was probably the most leader-like out of all of them, being the most proactive at managing everyone’s schedules alongside the company’s actual managers. She’s still as rough & tough as you’d expect a unicorn gator to be, though, likely due to her deep love of fighting games. Seriously, she’s highly ranked in just about every one she plays & has even won several tournaments since her debut. Just be careful not to get poked by her horn or slapped by her giant tail; she can be a bit of a klutz sometimes.
“What, surprised to see us?” Celine said smugly.
“W-Well, yeah, kinda, actually. How’d you guys even get in here?”
“Yeah. This is supposed to be a restricted area. How did you get in here?” Even with her glasses, it was clear Jones was giving them the stink eye.
“Oh we ‘ave our ways…..by which I mean the company gave us permission to be ‘ere” Elise noted as she pulled out a document & handed it over.
“…..I mean, that’s not really how this works…but fine. If you’re from the same company, then I guess I’ll allow it.”
“Well, if you say so…but seriously, you guys came all the way out here in person just to see me?”
“Ohoho, why of course! You think I’d miss such a monumental occasion for one of my most beloved peons?!” It still felt kind of weird to hear Tiara call her that in person, but nevertheless, the sentiment was still there & very much appreciated.
“Yeah, & I’m glad we did now…Dang, you clean up nice.” Completely unprompted, Orla began poking & prodding Lulu’s body.
“H-H-Hey!! S-Stop that! It tickles!”
“Alright, fine. Fair…Just be sure to tell me how you did this later.”
“Government tech, confidential, yada yada, now can we move on?” Jones was clearly starting to grow a bit impatient.
“Okay, okay. Geez, no need to be so pushy…” Lulu took a deep breath before continuing. “…So…you guys aren’t mad at me?”
“Mad? Why the heck would we be mad?”
“Well I kinda…ditched you guys for a bit there…” It was true. Prepping for this day took so much time & energy out of her that she hadn’t really spoken to any of them in months beyond a few text posts.
“I mean…you didn’t really ask for this, right? Hard to be upset at you specifically, in that case.”
“While I admit that I’m somewhat…miffed…that you’ve usurped my position, it’s very nice to see you moving up in the world, so I’ll forgive this transgression.”
“But I don’t want to move up! I’d rather…stay down with you guys…” She blushed a bit as she spoke.
“You say that like we’re never gonna perform together again.”
“…Well…Aren’t we?”
“So long as you don’t unveil any government secrets or the like, what you do in your free time is none of our concern” Jones chimed in.
“…..Oh…..Feel like you should’ve mentioned that sooner…” Suddenly her chest felt a lot less tight than it had a minute ago.
“You never asked.”
Lulu responded with a stink eye of her own, prompting her friends to start laughing. Joining in with them, it felt just like old times…times that there still would be plenty more of, apparently. Thank goodness.
“Look, Lulu.” Once the laughter died down, Elise gently plopped her hand on Lulu’s shoulder. “We get that this is a lot to take in. ‘eck, I can still barely believe it myself. Nevertheless, we’ll always be there for you, even if it’s not always in person. So ‘old your ‘ead up ‘igh & show this country you’ve got what it takes to lead it!” Her rousing speech was capped off with a “Heck yeah!!,” “Couldn’t have said it better myself!,” & a thumbs up from the trio behind her.
“…..You…really think so?” The four girls nodded in response (though seemingly without much confidence…but still).
“…..Sniff…I love you guys~” Her eyes suddenly wet, Lulu pulled them all together for a big group hug. Gripping as hard as she could, she basked in the moment with all her heart, wishing with every fiber of her being that it could last forever…but sadly, it wasn’t meant to be, as Jones gestured towards her in a way that screamed ‘Please wrap it up.’
“Welp…Sniff…See you guys on the other side.” With one final grin & wave towards the group of smiling faces behind her, she proudly (yet still quite nervously) stepped forward into the broadcasting area. Onto the stage. Into the unknown.